One of the tenets of my personal philosophy is that it is better to be respected than liked. This has not always been the case for me, for far too many years I wanted to please other people with the hope that they would "like" me. That is actually ironic because I can remember as a pre-teen being asked why I had to be so nice to everyone and told with a sarcastic bite that everyone liked me...wait, what?  Isn't that a good thing? Wow, was I confused!

So what is so important about the distinction between respect and being well liked and what does it have to do with photography? Well I believe that it is impossible to truly 'like' or love a person without first respecting said person.  One needs to look beyond the surface to the deeper aspects of the other person, to see what is truly behind that pretty face or hunky physique. When I am working I prefer for coworkers, supervisors, or clients to look at me and treat me with respect because I am good at what I do (a sign language interpreter in a public school but can rock a concert any day of the week!) not because they think I am a nice person.  True, I treat others with a level of respect that I would like returned in kind, but that refers back to my philosophy because I won't put on a sugary sweet act just to try to win favor with someone.

At some point in my late teens to early twenty's a boyfriend had said to me, quoting a popular song by the band U2, that "you give yourself away." OUCH!  He was most certainly not saying that I was a free and easy but rather that I wasn't being true to myself and was too much of a 'yes man,' at least that is what I came to believe he meant. I suppose I should ask him, but then again at this point in our lives I don't suppose it is really all that important anymore. It was at some point not too long after the U2 comment that I began a journey of intermittent self-reflection peppered with fits and starts of actual personal growth and character development.

What I wish for you see in my photography is the result of 25 years of post U2-comment growth that has brought me from a shallow 'yes man' too afraid to use my back bone and taking very good snapshots that I tried to pass off as photography to now, ahem, a mature woman who takes photographs which reflect a respect for my clients.  Capturing a moment is more than a click of a shutter or being at the right place at the right time (although that helps too), no, capturing your moments is about respecting you and your wishes. It is about honoring you, your family, your event.